Sacrifice.

So many have paid the ultimate price for our freedom.

For our right to come and go, shop, eat and whatever else we want to do.

My husband is one of those who serves in the military. He is not one to acknowledge his service but today, on this day - Memorial Day I want to honor him.

You see when Charlie went to Heaven he was overseas in Italy.

He may not have paid the ultimate price with his own life but he did pay by missing so much of his son's. Through it all he has never given up faith and has become closer to God even with all the anger and question within.

I couldn't be more proud to call him my husband and the father to our amazing children.

Thank you pizzles! We love you so much and I know that Charlie was right there with you as you crossed the line today at the Fallen Heros (Randy's Race) 5K.

Cheering daddy on at the race! :)

Eden Prarie Fallen Heros Memorial where the 5K was held.

The team! Go Navy!

Chief Kettle ran the 5K in just under 40 minutes with his full gear of 75 lbs. The statement says:

"Never left behind. Always remembered! For all the fallen, For my fallen."

I cried just reading this. Death is truly the hardest part of this life.

Foto Friday

I know....this is the second week in a row that I am posting my Foto Friday on Saturday. Busy is an understatement for our lives right now. Seriously. You see recently we have been blessed with an amazing opportunity to build our forever home....in the country!

I know. That is a HUGE statement and I cannot believe I actually get to say (or type) that. We have been busy picking out each and every single little detail and making adjustments to fit our needs. Seriously the builder we are working with has been amazing so far. I will be sharing so many fun posts for ideas I have once we get settled. The house will be ready in about one month and if you follow me on pinterest you can see all the ideas I have brewing under my New house ideas board.

Okay but for now here are some fun pics! :)

A little sneak peek of our backyard view. This is from the window over the kitchen sink.

Have a fabulous weekend!!

Picking up the pieces.

I am angry.

I am broken.

I am hurt.

There are so many parts to me and the way I process things.

If someone around me is falling apart, experiencing something horrific or having a break down I am the strong one. I am the one that rushes to their side to reassure them that everything is okay and that this world is not our eternity. I am the one that remains calm, cool and collected.

I thank God everyday, multiple times a day for Cannon, his health, happiness and for holding our little family together after Charlie passed. I thank Him for the path he has taken us on even though it doesn't seem fair and it angers me so often. I beg that His will be for me to have peace since I can't have acceptance.

Every day I struggle. I struggle with patience, acceptance, peace, strength and power and guidance over my actions and words.

It has been almost nine months since Cannon was born. I have not been away from him for the entire time other than an hour here or there when Sean has him.
No date night alone with my husband, no evening out with my friends, no day spent at the coffee shop just completely lost in a good book....nothing.

This of course is my own doing because I trust no one. I know I need a break but I literally do not trust a soul (other than Sean) with him. Honestly, I think the reason is more that I could never live with myself if something happened to him and I wasn't there.

I can't even enjoy myself for an hour when I leave him with my husband (who I know is just as, if not more, capable) because my phone is glued to my hand and I am constantly texting to make sure everything is okay.

The rage, pain, sadness and fear that I felt on June 18th, the day we buried Charlie, was the day I realize it was real even though it didn't (and still doesn't) feel real.

All the time and effort I have put into trusting God and learning from the bible seems to escape my mind so often and I literally loose control of my words.

I know God is working His plan in our lives. Being open to it and allowing myself to see that each thing that happens is for a reason has changed my life dramatically.

I only wish I had better control over my actions and reactions to people.

I seem to have lost the ability, or really the desire - to care about others feelings.

This is not who I am or who I want to be.

I am working on it.....but sometimes reacting just seems like the right thing to do in the moment.

I wonder what he would be like today.

 

Remember to live and to love!

Such an inspiring song.

Life truly is a gift.

Get out and do what you were meant to do...today.

Don't wait, don't delay.

Our time here IS limited.

Much love to you all!

(Hit the music pause button on the bottom left of the screen before playing this video)

Joy

I love so much when a friend experiences the level of love that a child brings into a home and relationship. It just makes my heart smile.

I am so thankful for our emotions. Without them this world would be so dull. Even the rough ones make this life bearable.

For even the most painful emotion was at one point rooted from complete joy. It's a reminder of that joy and the joy to come if we remain faithful.

Thanking God for all that He has done and given us in this life. I do my very best to keep my heart and head focused on Heaven.

Going to bed with you all heavy on my heart tonight.

If your feeling lost turn to His word.

If your feeling confident or comfortable in where you are in life reach out to someone and share the love.

Foto Friday

I have been so bad about keeping up with my Foto Friday posts!

Easy Wreath

This was  super easy craft and my favorite part is the simplicity of it. I have seen a bunch of wreaths similar to this but they all had way more flowers or a bunch of stuff on it. They were all adorable but I really wanted something simple and clean.

The Parts:

Use different sizes of circular items from around your house. (I used bowls for my larger flowers). Trace and cut out.

Then cut them like this all the way to the core.

Then begin to roll the strip up like this. Repeat for as many flowers as you would like.

The most time consuming part of this project is the yarn wrapped wreath. I literally took about 2 weeks to finish this project because I did a little here and there. You could probably do it in an hour if you have a solid one you could do it in. :)

Just keep wrapping until you get to the end.

Hot glue the end (and beginning if you missed that part.)

Then hot glue the flowers on in any place you like. I also added a wire ribbon bow to give it a little something extra. It was a scrap piece I had laying around. Love when I get to used the scraps!